Gurt Lush

Comedy painting

2009-03-24T14:40:00.002Z

Full report available on the BBC website.

The Women's Eights Head of the River Race 2009

2009-03-05T12:20:00.002Z

Greetings oarsmen and oarswomen of CBRC!

Randy Lush here opening the Bet Lush services for the Head of the River (albeit not the real one but the Women’s version).
If you’re wondering if cousin Gurt has definitely left our docks in search of rougher ciders with the inseparable Gurtrude, I can reassure you that he is still with us: last time Reet and I popped around for a cuppa, Gurt didn’t stop complaining about this thing called Facebook and how it has stolen all his friends (any ideas what he was talking about?).

This year’s WEHORR sees 3 bellicose crews from Bristol trying to ruin the party to the London crews.

Crew 55: Emma M, Jihan, Bekki, Ellie, Caroline R, Lauren, Hazel, Katy, cox: Diego
After a storming performance at Worcester (where they left their opposition trailing by more than a minute), the day after they lost their shine in home territory coming behind UWE and being beaten by the second eight. Too presumptuous? Too complacent?
The question is: will the intensive training endured by the first women’s crew during the winter finally pay off?
Judging from the last results, they are definitely the underdogs.
Bet Lush Odds 4:1

Crew 76: Frances, Caroline B, Lucy I, Emma D, Naomi, Emily, Jo, Zoe, cox: Kathryn
This crew is HOT HOT HOT!
A well mixed bunch of experiences, this crew is our hot tip for the day.
They were the first women’s crew at Bristol home race, coming in front of what it was once called the first eight. They then went to Avon County to rule those waters too. Coxed by the competent Kathryn, will they upset the squad’s establishment and earn the right to row in top boat Viridor?
Bet Lush Odds 3:1

Crew 129: Karen, Lucy F, Raegan, Lucy C, Ella, Elaine, Sarah, Emma N, cox: Carly
Completely made of novices, this crew will try to impress not only the other Bristol crews but also the London squads.
They don’t have anything to prove and they have the enthusiasm of a crew that has never rowed on the Tideway before; all factors that will surely contribute to an astonishing row. Coached by our own army boy James ‘Sikkers’ Fickling, we have no doubt that they will overtake several crews… but has anybody told Carly where the black buoy is?
Bet Lush Odds 6:1

Good luck to all the crews!

just when you thought it would never happen...

2008-12-15T19:41:00.004Z

It appears that Miss Greg, will be practising a new signature of Mrs Chambers.... you may notice (apart from the sunny warm looking weather) the shining rock on her finger in the second picture!

scullers' head

2008-12-05T15:56:00.002Z

Bristol Competitors to look out for:

23. Super slick Jack Mellor
80. Pocket battleship M.Duffy
152. From the darkside R.Mckensie
181. LWT Ali Kocho-Williams
269. FCUK Nadia Balhi
339. Ever Present Hazel Fullman
399. Battleship Crusher No 399
502. Ratemeter Graham Davidson No 502

Placings
Mellor or McKensie? Are you a gambler?
M. Duffy Bristol's own Daniel Craig? But unlikely to finish in 007th
Crusher - can the 'squatter of somerset' mow the course down?
Nadia or Graham - just one second divided them at Cardiff - will the external competition give Nadia the motivation to get that extra length on Graham?
Hazel or Ali - Both have left the kids at home, but will breastfeeding take its toll on ali?

know pain. know gain. know hoodie.

2008-12-05T15:39:00.003Z

Does anyone out there still look on this blog? YES! You do.

Well here's a reminder to get your hoodie orders in to Zoe before 19th December. I'm going to get Reet and Randy one to share for Christmas, though i'm not sure Randy will quite fit into an XXL.

Contact Zoe for more details

She can also cook a mean quiche

2008-10-17T11:12:00.006Z

Votes in, texts counted, but without a hint of the winner being picked before the show had ended:

The winner is CBRC's Jane Hall! ARA Volunteer of the Year 2008

Here's what the committee had to say about her.

Not content with all that work Jane also found time to play with Dom and not two weeks back produced the newest member of CBRC: little Rosemary Megan Hall (although apparently she's going to have trouble fitting into the shoes).

Congrats to Jane, and also Jane and Dom (to be fair, he did help a bit).

promoting diversity

2008-10-09T11:07:00.002Z

Dear Bristol folk,
it has been once again drawn to my attention that to address you all as 'oarsfolk' is no longer appropriate. It seems that CBRC's diversity policies are reaching far and wide these days - mountain bikers, runners, triathletes. What next, (pub)golf? Now, it seems one of our most stalwart members has put down her blade to take to the saddle. She still needs the lycra though...

It's a marathon not a sprint

2008-09-25T14:05:00.001Z

Report from one of our intrepid marathoneers:

Weather was good for a spot of rowing in a ditch in Lincolnshire. Womens VIII best COBRC time took longer driving home than it took to row the 50K. A wrong turning & an M6 delay, organisation had nothing to do with it! The battleship just fitted in the Dyke. Crusher in next with a respectable 4.18 but with women, juniors & vets in front and Nadia only 4 minutes behind. Junior j16's averaging at J14 4X- at 4.39 clear winners in their category. Sophie Dun the bravest of all coming in around the five hours. Sore arses, sore hands and T shirts for all. Hanham may see more COBRC crews training for next year.

Any photos??

Has Gurt died?

2008-09-25T07:44:00.005Z

Oarsfolk of Bristol, good morning to one and all. Gurt has reached a crossroads in his career. At a time when corner shops are closing, Tescos are springing up everywhere. The local cinema is closed, the multiplex booms. Folks, Facebook is killing me, see you all in hell! I feel snubbed, not invited to the party, with no place in the modern world. Randy has taken up patchwork, Reet has re-joined Gala Bingo. The irony is I have a truly incredible story to break to you. Who wants to hear it?? BetLush offers the following story characters:

Jimmy & Lauren Evens
Morgan and a local farmyard 2-1
Colin's sandwich 4-1
Naomi's head scarf incident 8-1
Diego and his bent rudder 11-1

Any takers?

Big hug to all
Gurt (considering coming back)

Bums away...

2008-08-18T09:04:00.003Z

With a large contingent of CBRC heading down to Perranporth this weekend there should be all hell breaking loose in Cornwall....

Especially when considering this motley crew is organising the trip!

Picture also appearing in this month's copy of Rowing and Regatta Magazine!

A brace

2008-07-24T11:42:00.004Z

It seems we have some super stars in our midst. Not quite content with beating all and sundry at MET last month, Billy and Sean chose to take on the cream of the crop at Nat champs this weekend just gone. A very respectable 4th place behind two Leander pairs and another from Glasgow Uni (it's worth mentioning that they stuck it to a pair from Tideway Scullers too).
Another crew worthy of mention is the Women's S2 4+ at Llandaff composed of Bronwen, Caroline, Zoe, Tracy and Capitano Lancaster doing the steering.

But before all this the mighty Crusher pounded the oppo, losing his N plates in the single scull at Ironbridge at the end of June.

Wins, people, wins! It's what we like to see.

By the way, if you think something is worth reporting, like someone touching someone else innapproiately or someone doing something hilariously amusing, then share it.
Especially naked stuff.

Cheers me darlins.

Be Prepared

2008-07-21T10:10:00.002Z

A message from Crush...

Tour Preparation. Step 1:

Morgan opens his legs for charity

2008-07-15T14:54:00.002Z

Dear oarsfolks of Bristol,
the funniest thing that has happened for ages is upon us - Morgan is running a half-marathon! Please sponsor him at the link below, he's raising money for a very good cause:

http://www.justgiving.com/morganspecht

If he raises £800, he has promised to run in a Bristol racing lycra. That's surely worth a bob or two!

No comment

2008-07-09T15:18:00.000Z

Just... No.
http://timesonline.typepad.com/surf_nation/2008/07/are-speedos-a-g.html
*Warning: The above link is not safe for work/home/your eyes*

Maundy Thursday

2008-07-03T07:59:00.002Z

Oarsfolk of Bristol, for another year CBRC’s Henley Royal Regatta campaign is over. Both crews were knocked out on the Wednesday by some classy opposition.

The ‘B’ crew entertained first, with a quick start that gave Belfast a scare, before the Ulstermen gradually edged away to produce a 2 ¼ length deserved victory. Rumour has it that the ‘B’ crew improved rapidly in the days leading up to HRR, taking all challengers off the stake boat on practice starts, and retaining their coveted title of being ‘unbeaten as far as the Temple’! The crew were pleased with their row and have enjoyed their season. Their photos and footage on rowtv always seem to indicate a highly agreeable, technical crew, but ultimately without the raw power to really challenge the best (although if wind power is what you’re after, middle four can always be relied upon. Another curry anyone?).

The ‘A’ crew raced in the afternoon in a clash with one of the favourites Leander Club. And the boys gave them a great battle, going down by 2 lengths in one of the events quickest races of the day. The A crew have put in an awful lot of time and effort into their HRR campaign and it was no fluke that they pushed Leander all the way. Many punters on the bank raised impressed eyebrows to see our boys more than hold their own, and in the post-race handshakes the Leander crew knew they’d been in a race.

So, some well-deserved Pimm’s and relaxing on deck chairs now? Roll on Friday’s social gathering! And what next for the men’s squad? A big well done to the whole men’s squad, for all their efforts and commitment.

Well hung, drawn...

2008-06-30T10:21:00.003Z

but by no means quartered (no, I know it doesn't make sense really. But I couldn't think of anything else with "draw" in it...)

Henley Qualifiers. Been and gone. Dealt with. Smashed to bits by both the 1st 8 and the sculling 8.

The Friday night action didn't disappoint. The 1st 8 set off behind Christchurch, with the scullers the next crew off after that. The wind, being an ever present joy this summer, made its presence known just after the Temple and continued to bounce around pretty much all the way down the course.
But after months on the docks with the gorge funnelling the channel wind and CoBRC being the gust-masters they are, both crews romped home inside the qualifying time.

After a jubilant evening on the town (more so than others in some cases) crews waited with baited breathe for the draw on Saturday afternoon.

As follows:
City of Bristol A vs. Leander
City of Bristol B vs. Belfast.

Provisional race times are out, with the Scullers on at 10:30am and the 1st 8 at 3pm.

Sufficed to say no-one will forget where they were when they heard that two City of Bristol 8s had stormed through to Thursday at Henley!

Friday night out on the town

2008-06-27T10:49:00.001Z

Not long now till the Bristol lads do their little time trials.

Good luck boys.

Reaching Out, Touching Me, Touching You

2008-06-26T09:30:00.001Z

Whilst the Henley crews were up on the Feeder on Tuesday night, a large proportion of Bristol's inhabitants stepped out to run for British Heart Foundation. When the fun and games were over it was just the paddlers that were still active on the docks, or so we thought...

As regulars will have seen, the surfboat (Sweet Caroline) is often practising its bizarre 180 degree spins down by the Lloyds building. Little did they know that the DJ from BHF Run HQ was partial to a bit of the Honorable President himself, and the sound of Neil Diamond flowed forth from their PA.

It is rare that rowers grab the full attention of the early evening masses, but even the diners in The Olive Shed were swaying their arms in time!

Far too eager Beever

2008-06-25T15:21:00.003Z

How does he find time what with work and Henley training?
I think Rhiannon might have to have a quiet word...

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7472988.stm

But then again he's always been controversial.

What a lovely Pair

2008-06-25T14:14:00.003Z

News has filtered through the haze of early season Pimms of a fine pair, seen joggling back and forth quickly and in time with a nice rhythm. Not so little Billyboy Downey and his chum and bowman extraordinaire Sean have set a first and done themselves and the club proud by spanking a number of other crews good and proper.

The lads won Senior 2 coxless pairs at Marlow on Sunday in appalling conditions. This apparently after Billy was reprimanded on the start line by an official for swigging on his water bottle and gazing wistfully into the distance. A couple of gleaming medals and a plaque are now safe and sound in Bristol.

Well done lads. Something for the rest of the club to live up to next year.
And if anyone wants an insight into how such a thing can come to pass, have a look at this little chap from a couple of years back. Proof that WeightGain2000 really works.

And through the hiss and static on the grapevine... News is coming in about an epidemic of coughs, colds and runny noses. Apparently there's a good deal of sniffing going on down the club.

Ladies that Row

2008-06-25T14:07:00.002Z

Being a butch manly man and not one to attend such functions that have the word "Women's" in the title, I inadvertently overlooked the fact that there were lots of birds in spandex getting sweaty all at the same time last week. So it's up to Dr K to fill us all in:

A rather successful Women's Henley

The 'serious' competitive season for the women's squad traditionally ends with Women's Henley. After a succession of disappointments, the four crews entered (another record for CoBRC?) were determined to set the record straight.

Friday saw qualifying races for the Intermediate 8 (our novices, from cox to bow Kathryn, Caya, Caroline B, Anne, Naomi, Lucy, Emma D, Amy and Emily K), the Intermediate 4 (our top crew: Diego, Rachael, Jihan, Bekki and Emma W) and the Senior 4 (Emily A, Tracy, Zoe, Caroline R and Bronny). No disappointments here, as all three crews rowed their socks off and secured their places in the regatta proper.

First round races also took place on Friday for both intermediate crews. The four saw off Bristol Uni with a solid row, proving themselves as a class act in the field, and re-affirming our position as the best of the south west. The eight (novices, remember!) excelled themselves yet again. Despite coming off worse at the start, they kept their heads and stormed through Upper Thames (just as they passed their own clubhouse, I am told) to come home with an impressive victory.

This meant a real treat for CoBRC fans, as no less than FOUR crews (with the addition of Nadia in the lightweight 1x) would be racing on Saturday!

Nadia committed to her strongest possible row, yet lost out to a sculler from Exeter Uni by just 3 lengths. We applaud her dedication and hope she's been treating herself with plenty of cakes now that the scales are less important!

The intermediate four drew York City who they'd been close to before, and pulled out all the stops to try and beat them. Despite having half a length lead after their blistering start, the southerners had to concede to the northerners, who were the eventual runners up. Another unrepresentative result for CoBRC (but at least it wasn't the first round this year!)

The senior 4 (weighing an estimated half as much as their rather beastly opponents from Newcastle University) were also disappointed, but remained upbeat since even qualifying at senior status is an achievement in itself. Check them out looking rather tidy in the time trials: http://www.rowtv.co.uk/ (I assume other videos will follow).

A pre-race disaster struck for the novices, when Emily was signed off at the 11th hour. Their cox, Kathryn, bravely jumped into the bow seat at the last minute (despite not having rowed for a couple of months due to coxing duties) and James jumped in to the coxes seat (I doubt he regarded this as a hardship!) The plucky lasses gave their all, but Osiris A were just too strong and eventually went on to win the event.

I would not wish to end on a negative note! This is the biggest regatta in the women's calendar and to have 4 crews very much 'on the pace' is a fantastic result for our little club. VERY WELL DONE to you all, and I will be there next year with bells on! Here's to a summer of fun, pots, and soggy ex-novices.....

Captain K.

Well done all you luverly ladies. Now you can all have a rest and get back to sunbathing on the landing stage for all the poor lads who are still training their not-so-little socks off.

down...but not out

2008-06-23T14:49:00.002Z

The second round of the Surfboat league went off with degrees of incident over the weekend.

The Bristol Hermaphrodites evolved into the Bristol Lobsters and celebrated this new monicker by borrowing a sweep (cox in old money) from Saunton Sands SLSC for their first round. The excitement was further heightened when they caught a wave on the return leg, in a very difficult choppy swell. When secure in a solid fourth place, a small crab was caught...

At this stage, on flat water, the worst you could expect is the ejection of the offending crew member. When on a wave, and a 3ft swell, the result was instant - a full capsize! The boys then made their way to the beach dragging a 250kg boat, with the pumps on full to expel all that water. Top paddling lads!

The Barracudas continued their assault on the title. The heats delivered a new start (involving standing on the seat??), and a handful of podium places (2nd, 1st and 3rd). Scalps taken during the day included Twickenham (manned by 2 former world champions) and Molesey, who crossed lanes with the Barracudas twice! The second time they tried it, 2nd Bow (Crush) suggested to their sweep that if they would like to get any closer he would "stick his balde up his a**e" (!). In a radical departure from normal rowing umpire's approach to such behaviour, this was deemed "Fair game" in the surf!

Depsite all that, The Barracudas were reminded of the "Fair Play Guide" at the post race beer-off. Naughty boys...

The day was rounded out with the boys securing a move up the league table from 6th to 4th. Now only 2 points behind 2nd, and all to play for gunning for Portreath and Perranporth.

(oh, and i am also aware of some wimmin's rowing at the weekend? anyone know anything about that? Bewdley was it? And something about Downey Jnr posting a victory with 2 Seniors before downing a bottle of full-bodied Merlow. What? I might have my wires crossed.)

Once more unto the small posh town in Oxfordshire, dear friends

2008-06-19T23:29:00.004Z

Roit up the gurly massive, moi luvvers.
Them birds are going at it large at Women's Henley this day.

Good luck to all lady crews from Bristol.

METrosexual rowing

2008-06-13T16:03:00.003Z

Ooer ooer a bit late with this one ladies and non-lady rowers. It's all the bar training on the run up to Henners.
MET regatta's been and gone! Where were you?

It was a weekend of swift racing and up to the line bowball breakers.

Saturday
The Women's Senior 3 4+ had the best racing of the day, seeing off everyone in their first heat comfortably, but missing out on the bronze spot in the final by a few seconds.
Also in a similar situation were the sweeping scullers in the Senior 3 8s who made it through to their semi quite happily but even though they put in a slightly quicker time in the next race were put down by a flotilla of cheeky students taking the top places.
The men's first 8 made an audacious move to take on the big boys in the Senior 1 and Senior 2, like last year, but were unfortunately 'in the wrong heat' for S2. Any other heat would have seen them in the Rep.
But a crowning turnip of achievement to the novice girls making their regatta debut in style but entering the S3 8s. Even a handful of crabs in the last 100m didn't stop them coming middle of the field in an event so heavily subscribed that it was only first 2 through to the final.
And finally to the resident lonely long distance sculler. Nadia pounded her way up another stupidly long course to finish 4th in her heat again just pipped, like so many City crews, to a spot in the final/rep by one place.

Sunday
Two ladies fours were out first thing on Sunday, both at Senior 2. The early birds didn't quite catch the worms this time as neither quite made it through to the semis.
Bit of a shift around as the Sculling 8 went up to S2 and the 1st 8 levelled out at S1. Unfortunately the 1st 8 could have done with a few more inches all round (or so I hear on the grapevine, which incidentally is positively bursting with juice at the moment. But that's for another day) as they missed out on the rep again by a fraction of a (bow) ball.
A swift ditching of four of the 8 left an S1 coxed four out on the water for another couple of paddles up and down the lake, and this foolhardy handful showed the burger chompers a thing or two by making it through to the rep without a bother.
The Scullers made a show of it and spanked down the course again for the rep in their category. Only one through to the final though, and those students were at it again. Listening to post race goss, it's the general consensus that Murph needs a couple less pies a day, while Billy could do with a few more weights to try and make his shoulders wider than his Jolie-bum.
The little novice lasses were S3ing it on Sunday too and yet again (which leads Oi to think that there might be some sneaky fixing going on somewhere) the rep was missed by only one spot and a couple of seconds.

So in short a little bit of a disappointing couple of days racing, but a decisive lesson if ever there was one to keep hammering for the line.

Next stop: Reading! (Tomorrow! Get the jaffas in)

Paddling in to the big Times

2008-06-09T08:38:00.003Z

Oarsfolk of Bristol,
surely with Henley just around the corner, some of our athletes are attracting press coverage in the Nationals? Yes, you better believe it - The Times no less!

http://timesonline.typepad.com/surf_nation/2008/06/porthtowan-blue.html#more

'What's the crack?' you might ask. Bristol has never been so proud of its hairy bottoms...

Wedged up and raring to go!

2008-06-02T17:06:00.003Z

A report from one of my cousins from the first surfboating race of the season.

(advisory - you may want to look away when you getting to the bottom of the report - picture contains some serious wedging!)

Dear Gurt

The pioneers of surfboating made their first official entry in the UKSRL this weekend, at Round 1 in Porthcawl, South Wales as the Bristol Barracudas.

Armed with a ratpack soundtrack the crew, Dom, Crush, Chris and Rus headed for the beach with their recently delivered surfboat, "Sweet Caroline". The surf was calm, showing barely 3 feet, but it was enough to provide some small amounts of fun.

Over three rounds the boys produced a second and two thirds. Picture of the day was the consternation shown on their faces when their 3 length clear water lead was eaten up by a wave, and they finished third. The other choice moment was seeing Dom exit the boat to commence his first sprint up the beach - only to find himself three feet deep in water, and face-planting. Genius!

The results in the heats was enough to get them into the "Golden Nugget" final.

After a strong start, a solid turn, and a monster wind-up the boys found themselves on a wave alongside four of the other five boats. Dom's sprint proved that a bunch of new boys can turn up, and throw the form book behind the bar with a second place finish.

A quick word about the Bristol Hermaphrodites. A top performance by the Surfboat novices, who learned how to start, and how to turn about 5 minutes before the first heat! Already brimming with enthusiasm for the next round, we are all hoping for a name change before they race.

I am leaving the next round in Saunton Sands (21st June) to you.

Your long lost cousin

Gethin Llush

Slippery when wet

2008-05-14T15:35:00.004Z

Yes yes ok. It's only fair to mention another un-ceremonial dunking in the docks that took place last week.
As most of you will no doubt know surf-boat fever is once again gripping the club.

The 'Lads' ( Rear-Admiral Crush, Captain Sparrow, Able-seaman Crofts & Cabin-boy Hall) are showing the way and last week donned their Speedos, lathered up their rears (that's another story. But who's idea was it to use water based cream?) and spanked off up towards the feeder.

All went well: Equipped with shiny torsos, shinier rears and the fabulous Baker-boy deftly steering, the bums were up and down the docks in a blur.

Not so dainty when it came to taking the boat out: Apparently not-so-Able-Seaman Crofts tried to show the ballerinas of The Fairy Princess his Grande tour de Promenade and promptly slid flat on his derrière into the waiting water.

Judges awarded a 8.5 - marked down due to too much cheek on show.

Swimmety swim

2008-05-14T10:20:00.002Z

What a morning.
No sooner had I raised my tousled head from the old bags and newspaper littering the gutter outside my abode and staggered back into the shelter, than I was on the receiving end of some frankly mirth making news.

It's not unknown in the summer time for some fair weather scullers to brave the skinny little singles and take to the water in the morning sun with the hope of showing off their toned, sweaty physiques to a bleary eyed commuter or two.

One such paddler is none other than Captain Andy 'Lollipop legs' Porter. Upon arriving at the boathouse and bleating about how there was a bit of wind and the water "...isn't mirror flat...", he none the less decided to chance the elements and toddled off to have a paddle.

But oh no. Disaster.
One witness described the event as "...delicate. Like a china rose slowly falling onto the flag stones to suddenly be smashed to smithereens..." while another was too busy drying his lycra after laughing so much to make intelligible comment.

Yes, Capt Porter made the ultimate sacrifice for his sport and whilst quietly mumbling the phrase "Oh dear, I appear to be falling into the briny." or words to that effect, slipped slowly sideways into the water. Then spent a good five minutes giving the docklands a view of his soggy posterior as he tried to shimmy back into his craft.

But after all that, he still managed to keep his perm dry. We salute you, sir.

It begins...

2008-05-06T13:57:00.006Z

Yep folks, summer's here and that means regatta fun fun fun.

This weekend was Wallingford regatta and there was a mighty Bristol contingent present.
12 boats raced in ten different events, 6 of those were finals and two of those went through a qualifying round to get there (phew!).

Special mention goes to:
The Novice Women's 8 who came 3rd only 15 seconds behind the leaders.
The Men's Senior 2 coxed 4 who came in storming 3rd in the final even with a 2 man who looked like a tomato.
The Women's senior 3 coxed 4 who came 5th in their final after a smooth 2nd place in their heat.
And finally the Women's Novice coxed 4 (B) who romped home in 2nd in a straight final along with their (A) boat. Good to see so many newbies pounding up Dorney Lake.

Full list of races, heats and finals results here.

Other weekend news...The battle of the men's 8s rages on with the crews finishing their respective heats within 1 second of each other, although neither qualified for the final.
But it seems that a secret weapon has been unleashed in the ongoing saga in the hunt for the fastest Bristol crew.

Rumour has it that the recently named CoBRC first 8 Sweepers have taken delivery of a temporary boat while Sims finish off the new vessel. Cryptically known as "The Fairy Princess" it seems that the new tactic on the cards is "intimidation by tutu".
Let's see what the Hen-party cruisers make of the fairies over the next few weeks...

Summertime

2008-04-22T08:18:00.002Z

And the livin’ is easy
Fish are jumpin’ and the cotton is high
Oh your daddy’s rich and your ma is good lookin’
So hush little baby, don’t you cry

Right, that’s your little Sonny and Cher rendition over with for another year (thank god for that). Yes, oarsfolks of Bristol, summer is nearly upon us again. Sunshine is guaranteed this weekend, as both the women and men head off to Dorney Lake for seat racing. Squad coaches will be selecting crews, looking to put City of Bristol RC on the map once again at this year’s summer regattas. There’ll be adrenaline, there’ll be sweat, there’ll be calls of nature in tuppaware, there’ll be kit failure, there’ll be body failure. There will be success. Good luck to everyone racing.

For rowing geeks out there (i.e. anyone reading this), here’s a little something Gurt wrote back in the summer of 2004.

http://www.oarsport.co.uk/training/guide.php?article=crew_selection

Hung, drawn...

2008-04-15T09:35:00.003Z

Message from Mr Holden who couldn't get his piccie to work:

"I just wanted to extend my thanks to the marshals who worked tirelessly directing the vast flow of boat trailers and spectators to the start line. Here we see a Marshal pointing the way to the “head”.
Tried adding this pic to gurt, alas in vain."

Aww. Gurt always obliges.
Even though I don't get it.

It could be your night...if you play your cards right

2008-04-14T07:49:00.003Z

Morning oarsfolk of Bristol,
I trust one and all are in good spirits this fine morning? Is anyone else having trouble with blocked sinuses? That creme brulee gets everywhere. It's worse than 4-day old phlegm.
Well, it seems like there was scandal galore on Saturday night, as Bristol's finest oarsfolk scrubbed themselves off and displayed their finest bristols. I am aware of at least 'a few' special comings together, but as always, my discretion will be exemplary, so your secret's safe with me ..... (kind of!)
Many thanks have to go to Emily and Rowena, for organising a fabulous event. And to Chris, our highly entertaining MC who hosted the show. Our captains made marvellous speeches, which showed up the diverse talent and the efforts that so many people make in our great club. Masks were aplenty, including many famous people such as Bruce Forsyth, Peter Andre and Colin Davis. Thank you everyone for making a wonderful evening.

Another good head

2008-04-12T16:59:00.003Z

With the distinct chance that events over the course of the next 12 hours filling these pages for weeks to come (come on, tell all... you know you want to) it's a good idea to mention that there head that took place earlier today.

A slightly smaller than usual Head of the Avon went off without any hiccups with weather to make an old man's heart glow like a surf boaters arse. Even with a slight shower to make people grumble before the start and several pleasure boats trying to wash scullers down, all boats finished the course safely.
The event was mainly a chance for good old CBRC to spank it along one of the longest courses that anyone round here feels the need to put themselves through, but there were a couple of additions from elsewhere too.

Thanks to the organisers, especially Brian who still seems to want to make his life as hard as possible every year. Cheers luvva.

And so well done all those who decided it would be a good idea to do a stupid amount of rowing this morning. No results as yet, mainly because people are putting party frocks on.
Now where'd I put me pulling pants?

Annual Dinner

2008-04-09T10:38:00.002Z

Dear love birds, with the upcoming CBRC annual dinner fast approaching, there will no doubt be a few sharks and dark horses out there polishing up their one liners and readying their fancy pants in the ever optimistic hope of some inter- or intra-squad action. Rest assured that the Gurtarazzi will be on hand to take snaps and facilitate wooing. Would any singletons out there like to make yourselves known? DateLush is launched...

This year, the two key pieces of information to remember are: (1) Mud Dock is the venue (or ‘Muddock’ as Emily likes to call it); (2) Haddock is the fish (or ‘Had Dock’ as Emily likes to call it). CBRC’s very own tsetse fly expert has worked tirelessly this year to bring us the prospect of a highly sophisticated night. Yes folks, if you’re lucky, while you’re enjoying your pan fried water vole with cabbage jus, Dr Adams will regale you with her range of amusing anecdotes. Just last night, I heard her whisper over the coxbox to her spellbound crew: “Trypanosomes are the causative agents of many diseases of medical and veterinary importance, including sleeping sickness and nagana in Africa, and Chagas disease in South America. Two, take a stroke”. Incredible.

Give it a little...

2008-03-19T15:46:00.002Z

A call has gone out from the fair ladies of the girly squad (through the fairer Kirsty):

If we raise £30 for the charity Breast Cancer Haven we can enter a draw to win a GPS cox box for the club. Not many crews have bothered so the odds look pretty good!
I've set up a justgiving page:
http://www.justgiving.com/cbrc_wehorr
Thanks

Of course it goes without saying that all you lovely rowers will leap upon this opportunity to support the girlies and club straight away with wide open wallets.
Indeed, one gent has already whipped the purse out of his Speedoes at lightning speed to make good his donation.
But, oh no! Upon setting his quid upon the table...

"I tried to donate £1 but said the minimum was £2 - does anybody want to go halves?"

Mr Miserly 2008 has already been awarded, apparently.

HORR 2008

2008-03-17T12:23:00.002Z

Dear Oarsfolk of Bristol,
a message from the men's captain:

Saturday 15th March saw the 2008 HORR take place in near perfect conditions. City of Bristol had the strongest entry in recent years with two top level crews comprising a good mix of experience from novice all the way to elite rowers and Henley winners.

Following last year’s disappointment all oarsmen were hoping for a more satisfactory conclusion to the winter training season. This was certainly achieved with the 1st VIII moving up 95 places and finishing 62nd while the 2nd VIII followed closely behind coming in at 70th. I’m fairly sure that City of Bristol has never placed higher in the HORR and certainly not with two crews in the top 80. The result is testament to the commitment of our coaching team as well as the talent of our oarsmen. Congratulations also to Dom, Russ and Crusher who made a guest appearance in the Blacksheep boat and finished 186th. Commiserations to the Vets who were unable to race on Sunday after the event was cancelled.

The Men’s squad finds itself in a new and exciting place with size and depth that has not been seen for some time. We have some challenges ahead to maximise our potential and I am also keen that we improve the development of rowers within the club so we can maintain what we have started. We have set ourselves up for a blinding summer and I am looking forward to seeing us well and truly on the map for the major summer races.

The time has come...

2008-03-14T10:35:00.002Z

Dear Oarsmen and old gits of Bristol, Randy and I are looking forward to our day out in London tomorrow. Make us proud. Best of luck to one and all, we’re hoping to see City of Bristol I and II right up there with the best. Both crews have worked really hard for this race, lets's see some deserved results. Good luck too to the Vets and our brave lambs racing for Black Sheep. Fingers crossed for a raging head wind. Open your mouths going under Hammersmith and we’ll pour down some refreshing cider...

Best of the West

2008-03-04T17:31:00.011Z

Here follows an account of the 2008 Women's Head of the River Race by El Capitano Lancaster:

On Saturday, the club sent a (previously unmatched?) total of four 8s to London to fly the CoB flag and compete in the Women's Eights Head of the River Race. The day dawned with gale force winds, and although the row up the start was somewhat reminiscent of James Cracknell's cross-channel escapades, things had calmed down significantly by the time the starting gun was fired (thank goodness).

The first 8 had a decent row to finish 66th, the highest placing for the club for some years, and arguably one of the strongest results ever given the ever-increasing standard of the competition. Not only that, but they put UWE, Bristol Uni, Exeter RC and Edinburgh Uni (big rivals since Henley 07) well and truly in their place. And all that despite suspecting there's a little more in the tank.... Looking good for the regatta season girls!

The second 8 rowed out of their skins to finish in 91st place, demonstrating the depth that we have developed in the squad this year. So next year the women will have 2 8s starting in the top 100, and bearing in mind that the 1st eight finished 115th 3 years ago, it's plain to see how far the squad has come come!

We also sent no less than TWO novice 8s, testament to the hard work of Emma W (novice captain), James F (coach) and the girls themselves of course. The first 8 finished a very commendable 164th, leaving many an S4 (or even S3) crew in their wake. The second 8 finished a respectable 234th, establishing our novice squad as the place to be (and there's a waiting list to prove it!) Perhaps we are looking to a record tally of novice pots once the regatta season is upon us?

Many thanks from the whole squad to everyone who has helped out during the preparations. We couldn't achieve such sparkling results without such great support from our coxes, coaches and subs. What a fantastic squad we have - long may it continue! Well done girls.

-----

Well done girlies.
Gurt enjoys such a large women's squad and all that it entails. Wins, of course.

Surf Boaties - Training Plan

2008-03-04T10:01:00.003Z

Can you Erg?, can you drink?, do you like tabasco sauce?, do you know the words of Neil Diamond Songs? A dedicated crew of Real Men will be out on the waves this summer. Only One Quiche Eater amongst them - the executioner Big Bad Dom. See him if you want to use their boat & get a second crew up.
One tour weekend guaranteed. Meet the judge, prosecutor & executor.

The original crews
what the f*#$ ?!?

How the pro's do it!

Ledge Head

2008-02-25T23:36:00.005Z

Reet thar, moi luvva?!

Gurt's well excited, ain't it? Not only has another cracking CBRC Head Race gone off well, but all them Bristol rowers have been packing away the medals.

Full list of all them lovely winners below.

S2 8+ Evan Bickmore, Rob Beever, Charlie Jones, Morgan Specht, Charley Breen, Colin Davis, Dan Brawn, Andy Porter, Ruth Cullingford (cox)

VetB 8+ Chris Sparrow, Martin Kelly, Martin Downey, Graham Davidson, Dylan Lang, Dominic Hall, Jack Mellor, Mike Murphy, Nicole Canty (cox)

WS2 8+ Katy Lancaster, Caroline Richards, Kate Knowles, Tracy Ford, Jihan El-Labany, Bekki Kedward, Emma Watson, Rachael Wright, Diego Colantoni (cox)

WS3 8+ Bronwen Daniel, Natalie Perumal, Jessica Voremberg, Corina Brocksopp, Lauren Obrentz, Nadia Balhi, Katy Lancaster, Kirsty McGaul, Diego Colantoni (cox)

WNV 8+ Emily Kingston, Anne O'Loghlen, Emma Drew, Jennifer Owsley, Issica Baron, Clara Kukulska, Caroline Barker, Lucy Imeson, Geoff Watson (cox)

S2 4x Mike Murphy, Aaron Pascovitch, Will Downey, Sean Bathe-Taylor

S4 2x Jack Mellor (composite with Crabtree BC)

J18 2x James Pentlow, Jake Sobstyl

WJ12 2x Catherine Street, Ellena Murphy

S2 1x Mike Duffy

J18 1x Jake Sobstyl

New Course records:

WS2 8+ 12:14.31

S2 4- 11:02.13

S4 2x 12:2329 (CoBRC/Crabtree)

Nice one to all the harassed organisers (Crush wasn't as wobbly as you'd have thought considering the rugby result on Saturday night) & volunteers for getting it all to run smoothly.

Come to Bed, mister!

2008-02-11T15:47:00.000Z

Yes folks, a tantalising evening of treats and fun awaits one and all this Saturday night (16th Feb) in Bedminster. It's Zoe's birthday of course! Come along and share in the mirth.

The amusement begins at 8pm at The Princess of Wales (Westbourne Grove), then moving on to Quinns (East Street) at 8.30pm.

Classic Bedminster games await, such as the "did you say my girlfriend was fat..? Are you calling me a liar" game, and the "Pin the Pole to the pole" contest. Prizes for the shiniest white trainers and best tattoo ensemble.

See you there!

Contender! Ready! Gladiator?

2008-02-08T11:07:00.001Z

Now while Gurt doesn't personally own any of these new fangled gadgets like a wireless with pictures or one of them telephones that aren't tied to the wall (although admittedly many an hour was once spent with noses pressed up against the glass watching Jet bounce around the arena) news has reached Gurt's cakeholes that Sky are intent upon re-launching the (somewhat) classic Gladiators series

But surely they can't be expecting all those once lithe and fit bodies to be up to the challenge these days? And the answer seems to be no.

Producers are a-hunting for some 21st century Gladiators to throw hapless contestants all over the matting.

Can City of Bristol rise to this challenge? Of course! There's been a whispering in the air that a certain fiery-haired fox might be the ideal candidate. Not only could she probably take down any foolish individual intent on stardom who got in her way with her bare hands, but of course after all that practice powering herself along (in one of those 'other' boats) she's now fully trained in using one of those giant cotton buds.

Then of course there's the possibilty of being taken down by two sisters at once...
More power to the mighty Maunders! Appearing on your boxes soon, maybe?

Diego and Madonna

2008-02-03T16:57:00.001Z

Morning oarsfolk of Bristol. During my usual eavesdropping on the Ladies' squad tea session, my ears suddenly perked up to a conversation I can only assume was about 'my favourite footballer'. Bekki was heard cooing about a certain 'Diego', with his "hand of God", his "incredible dribbling" and apparently "you should see what he can do with his left foot". "For a short, fat bloke, he's incredibly talented".

Yes folks, it appears that the CBRC love machine has cranked into action once again. With Valentine's Day on the horizon, BetLush is frantically assessing who will get together next. Is there anyone left who is single???

Dreaming of Sun, Sand...

2008-01-23T10:28:00.000Z

... and the smell of a burning bush.

Morning there all you avid Lushers. Another break in updates as Gurt has gone covert.
Yep, in the last month some of you lucky few have been stalked.

Gurt's been a-creepin' and a-crawlin' and watching you sleep at night. And stealing photos of you from the holiday album.

Yes just like the fabled chaste panda, there is a red variety of Beever too. Although only after it's been on its summer hols.

Festivities

2007-12-27T13:05:00.000Z

A slightly belated Merry Christmas! to all CBRC members, their families, loved ones & all other unfortunate folk who are tied to the club in some way.
Gurt apologises for the delay in festive wishes but he accidentally began celebrating a little early this year.

Back to the alka seltzer...

fundraising ideas?

2007-12-17T09:55:00.000Z

The cameras were out on a frosty morning at Col and Jo's previous rowing club, as boys and girls from Bournemouth University posed for pictures for their 2008 calendar. http://www.bubc.co.uk/

Rumour has it that Col and Jo first met on the set for the 2005 calendar, when they were stroke/cox of the ladies 8. Check out those cheese-hips!

Alter ego

2007-12-11T11:42:00.000Z

Morning oarsfolk of Bristol,

Randy and I have caught wind of a Christmas shindig happening this week?? You’ll be glad to know that we will be there, under cover of course. I hear the theme is ‘Bottle Green’. I thought that was Jane’s nickname, although it’s now ‘Bottle Hall’ I suppose. Photos and scandal to follow.

The venue is Alterego, the alter ego of which is a clothing company http://www.alter-ego.com/ “Feminine fashions for the taller figure who may be Transvestites or Crossdressers who like skirts, blouses and dresses in shiny satin and crispy taffeta”. Any takers from the women's squad? Or men's squad perhaps?

Billy?

Rob?

Cracking good fun

2007-12-07T18:41:00.000Z

As most of the club who read the recent men's squad news letter will know, one of the fresh-faced new boys to the club has been sizing up the lovely Brizzle lasses. Whether or not he's been successful is not something we shall dwell on today although the situation is being closely monitored...
But no, what's taken Gurt's sizeable interest recently is the young Lothario's tactics for attracting the (much) fairer sex.

But what is it that the ladies can see that we can't? A rude slogan on the back of his Tshirt? Perhaps an offensive mural on the side of the van? It took us a while to crack the problem, but when we got to the bottom of it we creased up with the rest of them.
For those of you who didn't make it to the end of the video one unfortunate is heard in the background to cry "My eyes! MY EYES!" before succumbing to a dead faint. Poor soul.

Strange courting methods to say the least but most likely developed from many a long coach trip with rugby types (and let's hope Crusher doesn't get any ideas). But maybe Gurt's behind the times. I remember when all it took was a nod & a quick scrumpy to woo fair Gurtinas back to my shed.

At the moment we're only getting films from one of the many Mediterranean looking folk who keep hanging around the place. This is of course totally unfair and will not be tolerated much longer.
So just to get some variety, and to make sure that the antics of none are left unreported, anyone is free to send along any films of fair Bristol Rowing folk doing things they perhaps shouldn't to the usual address .

Anyone else anticipating the Christmas party?

Horse Play

2007-12-06T15:07:00.000Z

At this time of year training just seems to be erg after erg after erg (or in the men’s squad’s case: erg after run after erg).

You may be interested to hear that I have discovered a new type of machine that allows for 'effortless exercise and body toning':

Could I suggest that the Concept 2’s at the club be replaced by a row of these? I’m sure the women’s squad in particular would love to saddle up and try for a 25 furlong PB.

Vesta Scullers Head - The results

2007-12-04T13:50:00.000Z

There were few surprises on Saturday to trouble the BetLush office other than the surprisingly calm waters. All CBRCs scullers raced well with another great result for top boy Jack Mellow:

33 22:09.75 J Mellor

123 22:54.91 M Duffy 253 23:58.05 M Downey 277 24:13.88 N Bromwich 285 24:17.61 M Mumford

344 24:57.79 H Fullman

355 25:09.39 C Breen

The Phoney Tough and the Crazy Brave

2007-11-30T09:50:00.000Z

With the weather forecast for tomorrow looking ‘a bit breezy’ the excuses have been flooding in thick and fast from scullers deciding that a gusty day on the Tideway is not for them. Top marks go to Ali who was so desperate not to compete that he chose to break his own fingers. Other retirees include Tony (illness), Nadia (injury) and Graham (illness).

Now looking to be a race to see who can actually complete the course regardless of time the conditions ought to favour the larger competitors. Pre race odds look like this:

Hazel – Strong and tidy 19-1
Neil – Going for gold 15-1
Charley – Determined to finish 21-1
Crusher – Stable as a battleship 10-1
Marcus – Like a cork on a tsunami 41-2
Mike – Compact power house 5-1
Jack – The Tideway's his second home 7-2

Good luck lads and lass!

Pimp My Scull

2007-11-29T13:30:00.000Z

Spotted in the boat shed last night were some gold boat numbers on one of the Carl Douglas single sculls. What next, a fur lined seat cover and diamante encrusted bow ball?

Where can I place my order….

Next stroke...smile for the camera...go!

2007-11-26T09:24:00.000Z

Downey Jnr works his socks off, as Downey Snr thinks "one for the album". Good work dad!

Back in business

2007-11-23T16:00:00.001Z

As mentioned earlier my health is returning slowly and now I am well enough to return to my preferred haunt of the docklands.Yes, I've been a little under the weather with a dicky liver. This is due in no small part to a certain competition held over East way a few weeks back...

Once again the start of the Head Season proper saw an influx of country folk to that most strange of lands. The Tideway.
The CBRC contingent numbered seven crews: Two men's S3 Coxed fours, three women's S3 Coxed fours and two Quads from the new sculling squad.

130: 85 Sen2 4x- 20:58.87

Photos of crew 85

138: 404 Sen3 4+ 21:02.58

Photos of crew 404

161: 55 Sen2 4x- 21:10.28

Photos of crew 55

275: 373 Sen3 4+ 22:10.10

Photos of crew 373

350: 436 W Sen2 4- 23:01.33

Photos of crew 436

422: 528 W Sen3 4+ 24:26.25

Photos of crew 528

423: 501 W Sen3 4+ 24:32.44

Photos of crew 501

Well done to all on racing in, quite frankly, appalling good Tideway conditions. It was pointed out to several newbies that they "ain't seen nuffin yet."

But why oh why did that cause me internal damage? Well little was Gurt to know that none of the aforementioned buggers in boats would be leaving the area to return and drink in Bristol. As such this poor little chap was left all alone in the Dukes Head with a round for everyone. After a couple of days of waiting and with only enough left for two out of the seven crews, Gurt came to the conclusion that no-one was coming to party with him, and headed straight to casualty.
Where he was diagnosed with possible sirosis of the liver and severe-talking-in-the-third-personaritis.
But Gurt's almost Ok now, Gurt is.

I am keen to hear of any gossip that I might have missed during my state of ill-health. Rumour has it there has been a wedding. But more importantly there was a wedding reception. Photos must exist in plenty.
You know where to send them.

Place Your Bets!

2007-11-23T09:20:00.000Z

Not a moment too soon BetLush is once again open for business and for the first time will be taking bets for one of the more testing events on the calendar: The Vesta Sculler’s Head on 1st December.

With a record entry from CBRC competing and some promising talent shining through there could be some tidy returns for the smart punter.

Nadia (WS3) – With training dogged by injury it’s likely she might not even make it to the start line. Worth waiting to see if the Doctor gives her the all clear nearer race day before parting with your cash. A long shot at 40-1.

Hazel (WS3) – Seated in one of the finest boats at the club Hazel can’t blame her equipment if she doesn’t perform. She has been seen giving some of the men a run for their money during training and will be looking to better them on the tideway. A possible top 5 finish at 20-1

Neil (Vet B)– Understated and low rating Neil could be the first sculler to complete the course with an average rate of less than 10. A steering incident at Ariel head left the bookies guessing as to his true speed but his solid technique could see him finish well. ‘I don’t believe it’: 16-1

Charley (N) – His unique racing preparation involving an evening in the Corrie Tap hampered his progress at Bristol Ariel head but Charley has been making steady improvements during his more sober sculling outings and is starting to look like a contender in the novice category: 43-2

Crusher (Vet C) – The surprise of the season for many, Martin ‘Crusher’ Downey has silenced his critics and is now snapping at the heels of the fastest scullers. Using one of the largest single sculls ever built is sure to give him an advantage if things turn rough out on the Thames. An optimistic 12-1

Marcus (S4) – Numerous underperformances during the build up to the race has left many losing confidence in this slender sculler. Sure to struggle in all but the flattest of water his result is well and truly in the lap of the met office. A doubtful 41-2.

Ali (S2 LWT) – Unseen and untested choosing to train on foreign waters Ali could be the one to watch, assuming he has managed to stay away from the early Christmas excesses and makes it past the weigh in. A risky 12-1

Mike Duffy (S2) – Finishing just off the podium at Cardiff has got this sculler some welcome attention and many reckon he could be on his best form yet. Worth a punt each way at 6-1

Tony (Vet B) – The true contender for the crown of Bristol’s fastest sculler. Racing Elite in his youth and now competing for the Vet B pennant Larkman looks sure to be unstoppable. Clear favorite at 7-2.

Graham Davidson (Vet F) – The most ‘experienced’ entry but showing no signs of slowing down. With a win at Cardiff under his belt from this year and an excellent track record for the Championship Course Graham’s only weakness is his over enthusiasm. ‘Pick up the rate’ 19-1

Jack (S4) – A top 30 result last year has given Jack the number 18 start position. Racing alongside some of the top scullers in the country ought to help bring out his best but there is a rumour that he’s not as quick as he used to be. Still the only boat likely to give Larkman a run for his money: 5-1.

Keeping an eye on the men's squad

2007-11-23T08:40:00.000Z

Greetings oarsmen of Bristol. What a relief to be finally discharged from Cinderford General Hospital. I'm on the mend and back, even if slightly yellow!

I have returned to news of nakedness and wig-wearing amongst eminent members of the men's squad. Gossip and counter-gossip is welcomed on this site.

Facebook is dead, long live Gurt Lush!

Ow Bist Me Babber?

2007-11-22T13:14:00.000Z

Greetings oarsfolk, Reet Lush here stepping briefly into cousin Gurt’s shoes while he recovers from his latest liver transplant (3rd time lucky).

He would like to pass on his thanks for the kind gifts and cards that he has received particularly the book of amusingly shaped vegetables and the 8-Track of the latest Worzels album.

1st capsize of the season

2007-10-24T09:39:00.000Z

I have heard news of the first capsize of the year (there may be more) but this one was down to a 'clashing of blades, as an LVIS crew ** went under one of the bridges "a bit central" and met with a UWE women's 2x also "a bit central", and the 2x come of worse after deciding to fall in.

All parties appear to be unharmed - but I bet it was bloody cold this morning after a dip in the docks!

** For those of you at the Regatta, you may remember the LVIS (Las Vegas Institute of Sport) racing the CBRC men's 8 in the final - they wear the dodgy purple and yellow kit!

Competition review

2007-10-02T10:49:00.001Z

Of late I have tried not to copy anything off the Slug due to the amount of grief that I received, but this I thought important enough... and it's about rowing before any one else complains

The competition review has come back with some findings (and suggestions) as to make regatta racing better....

For those of you who have been around rowing for a few years will remember the times when S4 did not exist - you went straight to S3....

It appears that they have now effectively removed the S4 level again, renamed it all and spread things out a little.

Anyhow - as you will all be involved in the new system (and some people might not know about the slug) - here is the report, and you are encouraged to make any comments you may have to your divisional rep!

Stone, paper...

2007-09-29T16:50:00.000Z

With the men's squad dinner this evening, it's time for a quick trip down memory lane for all those stay at home types. Here, for your delectation, is a small slice of what went on after the Head of the River cancellation in March.

Gurt is reliably informed that not only were all participants willing and able to take part, but that they suffered no lasting ill effects from the experience.

Half a mars bar & a copy of last night's Evening Post to whoever can name all the observers who can be heard in the background giggling at the plight of our cheerful little Beever. Time to be named and shamed.

How 'British' are you?!?

2007-09-27T12:06:00.000Z

Came across this little bit of British Bureaucracy gone mad

The world-famous Red Arrows have been banned from appearing at the 2012 London Olympics because they are deemed "too British". Organisers of the event say that the Arrows military background might be "offensive" to other countries taking part in the Games. The display team have performed at more than 4000 events worldwide, but the Department of Culture, Media and Sport have deemed the display team "too militaristically British". Red Arrows pilots were said to be "outraged", as they had hoped to put on a truly world class display for the Games, something which had never been seen before. Being axed from a British-based event for being "too British" is an insult - the Arrows are a symbol of Britain. The Red Arrows have been excellent ambassadors for British overseas trade, as they display their British-built Hawk aircraft all over the world. The Arrows performed a short flypast in 2005 when the winning bid was announced, but their flypast at the Games was to have been truly spectacular.

It is to be hoped that common sense prevails If you disagree with this decision, sign the petition on the link below

http://petitions.pm.gov.uk/RedArrows2012/?ref=redArrows2012

A Death

2007-09-27T12:04:00.000Z

Message From Pete.....

Some of you may know that my Great Aunt passed away a few weeks ago. I spent some time with her at her death bed, where I promised to name a boat after her dearest friend, the late Bibbi Boatt (the famous Kazakhstani international sculler).
My aunt met Bibbi in her university days, where Bibbi was known as 'Bali Fast' Boatt. I am not sure whether this was a reference to her way with men or her sculling skill. Apparently some years later, my aunt travelled with Bibbi to the Soviet Rowing Champs, where they encountered that famous Russian supremo - Paulaurarmoff, in his prime, and another conquest for Bibbi. Bibbi Boatt had many grand-children, many of whom were impressive rowers; we all recall the Kazakhstani eight in the Olympics in the eighties, and of course there is her famous grandson Borat .

Marcus will be officiating on Sunday with the boat naming ceremony, and the one minutes silence.

Pete

Crazy Fools

2007-09-24T15:48:00.000Z

The thought of 31 miles sat in a rowing boat on a pretty much straight piece of drainage ditch between Boston and Lincon is not my idea of fun, but it obviously sounds like a good idea to some of us...

Message from David "walls look a bit dreary" Kearley follows!

Myself, David Cranstoun-Plemming, Billy, and John Thwaites entered and won our class and broke the course record for a novice quad with a time of 3:52 over the 31 miles or 50k for those who like metric.

So, City of Bristol has taken on clubs from all over the UK, Wales and Scotland included, beat them and shown what we can achieve. A very special mention must go to Nicole Fellows who drove all the way up and supported us providing drinks and encouragement all along the course, we couldn't have done it without her.

Our hands kill and I personally have booked myself in for re-constructive bum surgery.

You won't get any sympathy from me - if you are foolish enough to enter, then you deserve sore hands and arse!

Private Ads

2007-09-17T16:04:00.001Z

Would you believe it? Not content with being the resident HoneyMonster it seems that a certain Gentleman of the Club has branched out into the horticultural scene.

Gurt knows of at least one 'happy' and now tomato-less customer already, who when asked about the work carried out commented: "It's like acid. The poor little blighters never stood a chance."

Fill in the Blanks

2007-09-13T16:59:00.000Z

Well, OK it has nearly been a week since the half marathon. I have got some times, but I think some of the runners must have been running under other names. (cannot guarantee 100% correctness - especially if you have a common name!)

So here goes - if missing and you want it shown for general consumption, then post a comment!

Chris Sparrow (in dog outfit) - 2:15 - well done - I bet it was hot in there!
Russ - 1:58
Jo (Mrs Russ) - 1:35
Gav - 1:51
Marcus - 1:26 - Ousted
Rob McKenzie - 1:21 - Fastest so far
Jane - 1:42
Neil - 1:42
Colin - 2:07
Alex Chenery - 1:37
Malcom Cambell-Ritchie - 1:36
Philip Denny - 1:44
Nick Baker - 1:55
Katy - 1:59
Mrs Baggy - ?
Dr Jones - ?
Sam Bailey - ?
Beever - ?
Sniffer - ?

The Sparrow Dog....?

Rowers or Runners?

2007-08-29T08:17:00.000Z

Now that the summer season is only a memory, it is the time of year when half the rowing club decide to become runners.....

The Bristol Half is almost upon us, and there should, as normal be a number of CBRC members running. A couple of names I have heard is Marcus Mumford, and more interestingly Chris Sparrow, who for the day will be turning into a guide dog.....

He will be collecting money for Guide Dogs For the Blind, and you can sponsor him on his justgiving site (including the picture of his costume, and why he is doing it). His aim is to do it in under 2h45.

And the winner is....

2007-08-28T08:12:00.001Z

The end of the regatta season has reached us yet again, marked as usual by the GBR weekend.

In most unusually sunny and wind free conditions the docks looked almost rowable this year - although the size of the buoys were a topic of hot debate - they were more man size that buoy size - with the outcome of a lot of coxless (end even some coxed) events being determined by who didn't hit one of the course markers.

The most important races of the day was the inaugural CBRC corporate rowing event where local companies were pitted against each other. The winning crew of the day went to Rach, and the Edward Drummond crew. Which saw Rach pocket the winnings from pot! The wooden spoon race was grudge match between the ParsonsBrinkhoff crews. I think that all involved enjoyed the day, and there were certainly many mumblings about joining up for real!

Other races of note was the S2 8+ with the CBRC crew showing the CBRC 'elvis' crew that age, experience and cycling training is not enough!

All the other results are on the CBRC site.....

In need of some help

2007-08-23T13:41:00.000Z

We are still looking for volunteers for the Regatta this Sunday.

Any club members racing at the regatta will be expected to help out when not racing, but to be sure that you get a job you want to do, then volunteer NOW!

The weather is looking as if it will be kind to us, so if you are not racing, but have some spare time then come and sit outside in the sun and hold some boats on the stake boats, or flip some burgers on the BBQ!

Please let Nick Baker know if you are going to be around - or what you would like to do to help out.

A smooth running regatta will encourage more people to turn up next time, and the more people that turn up the more money we get to buy some new equipment!

OH - and you also get to watch the corporate rowers race after only a few weeks learning, so that should be quite comical!

what really did happen in Oxford?

2007-08-21T21:20:00.000Z

It was a moderately successful weekend for CBRC at this years Oxford Regatta, although we failed to repeat the success of last year in the Mixed Medley by loosing out in the first round of the Mixed 8 on Sunday morning pushing us down from top to fourth....

The rowing success's went to the WS4+, in their first regatta since winning their novice pot at Llandaff, and the S34+ finally winning a pot that they deserved, and making sure that the heaviest cox in history came home with a pot! On Sunday it was the turn of the 8's to win with both the men's S3 and women's S2 8's winning.

Gildas won the value for money prize with a grand total of nine races over the weekend and a pot.

Special mention should also go to the youngsters in the N2x, who made a better job on the steering to beat Colin and Evan.... I think Colin was still drunk going by the line he took down the course!

But it was the off the river antics that was really the source of newsworthy gossip, with Billy and Jack attracting the attention of some of the women's squad (or was it the other way round?!?) Apparently there was much tent swapping going on in the dark of the camp site, but all members were keeping very quiet on the evening activities!

Corporate Betting

2007-08-20T08:25:00.000Z

It appears that things have moved on since the last post, and some actual money has been put down.

The format is £10 per cox into a winner takes all pot.

The word on the street, sorry docks, is that Nicole's crew is odds on favourite for the win.... But all will become clear when we see them in action on Sunday at Bristol and Avon Regatta

Fears over drowning subside

2007-08-14T14:19:00.000Z

Bet Lush is open once again....

We have 8 crews corporate crews racing at Bristol Avon Regatta in hope of winning some shiny pots, although the main aim for most crews will be avoiding the wooden spoon prize . Scenes of spidery crews drifting up and down the river are no more as each crew has come on in leaps and bounds in just 2 weeks.

Andy Porter has put forward two crews from his company, ParsonsBrinkhoff who are reported to be doing very well although doubts over one crew have been whispered as they've recruited 4 learn to row hopefuls (no experienced rowers allowed). This could go either way and after one outing, feedback is positive about their form as they managed to row all 8 together on their maiden voyage. Ruthy and Emily are currently holding the reigns and it will be the ex-women's squad coxswain, Katy, who takes Emily's place on the day. Could the club's best female coaching talents turn things around?

Nicky B/Emily/Katy joint effort- 3:1
Ruthy's L2R/Porter composite - 4:1

BAE, coxed by the our resident international coxswain Diego, have been moving together well. Could be a winner and have been consistent throughout.

Bet Lush odds - 5:3

Entec are also moving well but are disadvantaged by their coxswain, Jane - can she steer a straight line? If her sculling is anything to go by, doubts are well founded.

Bet Lush odds - 3:1

Gildas's employer, Nallatech have had a shaky start with holiday staking president over rowing. Still, they're a strong crew, possibly weighing in as the heaviest including their coxswain, and brute strength may prevail over technique in this instance.

Bet Lush Odds - 4:1

Unity, put forward by Stuart, have also had availability issues but are remarkably neat and tidy. The exact counter-argument to Nallatech's approach, could technique be the overall winner?

Bet Lush odds - 4:1

Edward Drummond are another crew benefiting from dedication and consistency. The keenest of the lot perhaps, inspired by the lovely Rach, and with an unparallelled competitive edge, they are hotly tipped.

Bet Lush odds - 5:1

Last but by no means least are an EC Harris, Bristol Airport composite who were introduced by ex-club member Nicky Heappy. They have had some early substitutions rocking the not-yet-stable boat. Just like their employer, this has caused problems in take-off but they have the potential and could put in a strong finish with Nicole's expert tuition.

Bet Lush Odds 3:1

Odds are changing rapidly, so keep up to date on their odds as the weeks progress...

Car problems?

2007-08-09T20:17:00.001Z

Llandaff international washout.

2007-07-16T10:26:00.000Z

This weekend saw the start of the local pi$$up regatta season now that all the serious racing is over and done with!

The weekend did not get off to a good start, with the regatta being postponed by two hours while they waited for the water level to lower, as they were a little worried that they might loose some boats over the weir due to the faster than normal flow. They also shortened the Saturday course to 500m free start, and then due to even more rain on Saturday night, shortened the course even further on Sunday by finishing further up the river to give boats enough time to turn without getting mixed up and going over the weir - which caught some Bristol crews out on the Saturday.

The first casualties being Diego, and Katy, who after racing each other for WN4+ decided that they liked each other too much and very nearly going over the edge, with only the tree to cling to, and eventually a safety launch to pull them to safety. The men's novice 8, also had the same problems, but also holed their boat with the oppositions bow ball!

There were also some of our new juniors racing on Sunday, and the WJ124x+ coping with the weir a lot better that some of the more senior coxes out there!

As ever there was a very good BBQ selection, and cake stall, with Crusher talking himself into lots of free cakes from a certain Llandaff lady, not quite what the husband had to say!

It goes without saying, that there was also much drunkenness in the evening, eventually resulting in some nakedness, but only by some of the younger racers - and I know that there were several camera's around - so email some of the funny ones over, and I will post them up for all the none facebookers....

Winning Results

Saturday
WN 4+ (armstrong)
MN 8
MS3 2-
WS3 2x
MN 2x

Sunday
WN4+ (ford)
WS38
MN2x

More details on the CBRC website

Finally, a picture on how to tie a boat on woman's squad style!

Maunder makes the national press!

2007-07-10T10:52:00.000Z

It has only been a week, and already she has managed to get herself into the national press.

For those of you who read the Sunday Telegraph, I am sure you read the article. For those of you who missed it here is the electronic version.

My favorite quotation being -

"The whole thing's shaking," exclaimed Julia Maunder, her face furrowed in concentration.

But also some of CBRC should take note of some of the training rules, one in particular -

"If they turn up late for a training session, they won't be allowed to train. If you turn up late for your Olympic final, you've missed your race and your chance of a gold medal"

The Blog of all Blog's

2007-07-05T14:34:00.001Z

If you want to know what a GB athlete has to go though....

Try reading this

And then she was gone

2007-07-04T17:39:00.001Z

I think that everyone present at Julia's going away party had themselves a jolly good time. Now that she is safely up in Nottingham, here are a few photo's from the night!

There was drinking......
Dancing.....
Some mutual appreciation - especially by Jimmy!
Many successful attempts of the La Rocca Challenge....
Lots of dancing - so much that it started getting a little sweaty....
Which resulted in Nakedness (and more appreciation by Jimmy!)

HRR Result.....

2007-07-04T14:31:00.000Z

Not good news to report today I am afraid to say - with a 1st round loss to tideway scullers by 1 and a quarter lengths in a time of 7.40

The unlucky Henley experience for CBRC continues!

HRR draw....

2007-06-30T17:18:00.000Z

Luck does not appear to be smiling on CBRC in Henley this year, with the Men getting a tough draw in the Thames Challenge cup, which sees them up against the seeded Tideway Scullers' crew in the first round.

The full draw is available here

1st race 3pm tomorrow (Wednesday)

Qualification (with results)

2007-06-29T12:26:00.000Z

Today is qualification day for Henley Royal Regatta.......

Good luck to all the boys in the 2nd eight racing today for a go at the real thing. Racing starts at 4pm with the 8's off at 6.30.

Will update when I hear any news.

Full results here....

Last orders..

2007-06-28T10:41:00.000Z

Time has unfortunately been called on Miss Maunders time at CBRC, as she heads up towards the middle of the country to swap her rowing oar, for a kayaking paddle in Nottingham as part of the GB Kayak squad.

She will be leaving us this weekend, but not before one last visit to her favourite club in Bristol. Yes, that's right - LaRocca her she comes.... I hope they have got a good supply of straws!

Meeting in Baroque at 8:30, then heading over the road some time after that! So come on out and say one last goodbye to Jules in the place where she become known as the red squirrel...

And here are a few photo's from some of her previous visits to remind you!

If you have any other embarrassing/incriminating photo's of Julia in LaRocca, then email them over, and I will put them on! (if you can't embarrass her when she is leaving, then when can you!)

Henley Royal

2007-06-25T08:36:00.000Z

With two eights entered this year (probably on one the biggest CBRC entry for quite a long time) hopes are high for the men this year round.

Good news coming through is that the 1st eight have pre-qualified, which should make their draw slightly easier. The 2nd eight are going to have to go through qualifying, and are racing for 7 places out of 20, so are looking at a tough race on Friday.

Women's Henley

2007-06-25T08:17:00.000Z

The weather was not really playing ball at the weekend, with some heavy storms making the going underfoot VERY muddy indeed, and resulting in all the trailers getting stuck in the trailer park!

As far as the Bristol results went, it was not good reading. The 4, despite one of their better rows (but several inches of rain in the boat) lost out by five seconds in their qualifying race. The 8 had a good qualification race, but then got a tough draw against Edinburgh and despite having the fastest time in their heat (up to 35s faster that some heats!) went out in the 1st round - Just going to show the harshness of knockout racing!

The only 'crew' to get to race on Saturday was CBRC's very own 'pocket rocket' Jane Green, who again had a tough draw against a GB trialist and went out in her first race in the Senior Lwt 1x - not bad considering she has only been sculling for a few months!

Henley, Henley

2007-06-21T13:49:00.000Z

Henley (in one guise or another) is the word of the week this week, with the Girls having a go down the famous course (well most of it anyway) this weekend - starting tomorrow, and the boys in a few weeks time!

All the action, and the results from this can be found from the website, which should post the results as they come though!

Good luck to all the Ladies rowing this weekend. Make sure you keep up to date with the intermediate 4's and 8's (qualification races Friday morning), and not forgetting Miss Green in the senior Lightweight 1x! (1st race at 1.38 on Saturday!)

And then it is time for Henley proper, sorry Henley Royal! Qualification is next Friday, and the entries are online so you can measure up your opposition!

I make it PIMMS o'clock!

Elizabeth Beever

2007-06-18T08:06:00.000Z

In a move from the normal blogs, I have to report the very sad news in that Rob Beever's sister, Elizabeth, was tragically killed in a train crash in Sardinia at the weekend.

The thoughts of the whole club go to Rob and his Family though this tough time.

In memory of Elizabeth, and in Rob's absence, the Men's 1st 8 raced at Reading with a black band around their all-in-one, and card was signed by all those present at Reading over the weekend.

2x4 or 1x8

2007-06-14T08:49:00.000Z

Some interesting crew selections are going in the men's GB squad, with the top 4- being joined by another four members, and racing in an eight, against the squad 8!!!

Should be interesting to see which one comes out on top?!?!

yet more reasons for cider!

2007-06-07T10:36:00.000Z

Yet more reasons why cider is a great drink.

Not only does it taste good on warm summer days (not including girly Magners on ice!), full of vitamin C, good for you, gets me really pi$$ed and makes me do silly stuff!

But now I can swim in a nice warm swimming pool safe in the knowledge that my ice cold cider has warmed the water up for me!!!

Social networking

2007-06-07T09:28:00.000Z

Looking through some of the comments that have appeared here recently, it appears that I am missing out on where the gossip happens. I was only able to get a few photo's of the Rubix night, but apparently there are loads of them on this 'Facebook' thing.

I was about to join (too see what all the 'kids' were up to), but then I read this and decided that being that I am 105, I might be a little past it!!

Debate for the day!

2007-06-06T12:59:00.000Z

Personally I have nothing against the colour....

Is gingerism as bad as racism?!?

Who knows - you decide!

Sun and Suntans at Metropolitan....

2007-06-04T19:52:00.000Z

The sun was out, and the wind that was so very there a few weeks earlier at Wallingford had not returned with near perfect racing conditions - even possibly a little hot for 2000m racing.

Yes apparently that really is Dorney lake - it can be wind free!

Rob had even brought some fake tan to make sure that he got ahead of the tanning game, but ended up with streaky legs - and then he ran out of fuel on the way home on the M32!

On the racing front, there were no medals for CBRC, although all crews had some good racing. The best result coming from the Women's 1st crew in S38's coming in second behind Osiris. The men's 1st crew deciding to hit above their weight entering S2 and S1 8's had a little bit of a tougher time, but not doing a bad job getting into the finals in both events.

The second crews did not have quite so much success not making the finals, but still looking good for Henley qualification. Even the women's 4 who had to pull Jimmy's fat arse down the course!

Things are looking good from the prospective Henley's which are fast approaching.

What colour were you?

2007-05-29T20:43:00.000Z

Julia just about managed to survive her first quarter of a century - although, I think it touch and go the following day, when she headed off to her other family for a BBQ, and had to stop off to be sick out of the car!

Anyhow - here is a small selection of all the pictures that were taken!

Bow 10 warming up, stern 10 sitting the boat

2007-05-21T10:02:00.000Z

Now I would like to see this racing through the docks.... Brewery bend could be a bit of an issue though!!!

http://pagopago.com/fautasi/fautasientrance.html

Tick Tock

2007-05-21T09:51:00.000Z

Ever wondered what make the Women's captain tick?!?

Well now you can find out from her very own website and blog....

I am assuming that the blog will come to life when she spends every waking hour training to get into the GB kayak squad!

Sleeping beauty

2007-05-20T16:44:00.000Z

So who is this who is taking her rowing so seriously that she has decided to sleep at the boathouse....

Looks like someone has been working hard in her races.

white, orange, blue, green, red or yellow

2007-05-20T16:28:00.000Z

Which colour will you choose to end up in at the end of the night!?!

Any body fancy a punt on who will be -

a) the first person to get some kit off
b) the winner

I know where my money will be for a)

clic,clic,clic,clic,clic,clic, clic,clic,clic,clic,clic,clic, clic,clic,clic,clic,clic,clic, clic,clic,clic,clic,clic,clic,

2007-05-15T09:20:00.000Z

While most of us, especially the women who endured 8 hours of seat racing in the wet and wind, were getting wet on the water, Mr Mumford was hurling himself round a mounting bike in the clic 24 hour race.

The weather, before and during the race did not help -

"Perpetual rain the week before had turned large sections of the course into a quagmire making progress tough during daylight hours and very tricky at night!"

He didn't quite make the full 24 hours, with bike and body falling to bits, but still managed a very respectable 170 miles (third overall in the individual event).

well done mate - you crazy fool!!

Evesham and Wallingford Regatta's

2007-05-08T08:01:00.000Z

This weekend saw the first regatta's of the summer season, and a selection of the club were out competing in the sun of Evesham, and then the wind of Wallingford (at Dorney Lake).

Evesham was it's normal chaos, but this year even worse than normal, with racing still going on until after 8.30 in the evening! The club's showing was not as good this year as last, with the only pot coming from Jane in her billy no mates scull.... although there was a number of good races, and a last minute withdrawal of the WS34+ opposition in the final scratching, and denying a potential pot. Oh, and did I mention the men's double that hit a buoy, and capsized?!?

Wallingford on the other hand managed to run pretty much on time, despite the strong cross tail wind making life difficult on the start keeping the boats straight. There was some good racing, but little reward, the SS 2- coming in a close second, if they had nailed the start then it could easily have been a very different story. The WS48+ won their heat, but came in third at the final, but a good result for a scratch crew on the day. The WS24+ also had a good showing in their heat, but the conditions, and the weekends racing I think taking their toll in the final and coming in close 5th....

Place your bets

2007-05-02T08:06:00.000Z

Think you know what's what in rowing?

Then place your bets here, and see if you really do know which club is on a roll this year!

http://rowing.inklingmarkets.com

Not seen CBRC mentioned much... time to prove them all wrong?!?

Mix alcohol and rowers....

2007-05-02T08:02:00.000Z

And this is what you get.....

Lots of daft photo's and some handsfree desert eating whether you like it or not!!

(check back soon for another video.....)

What no more Gurt Lush Awards?!?

2007-04-27T13:01:00.000Z

As Gurt Lush, I can not really complain about this, but normally one of the Lush awards at the dinner is the romance of the year which was sadly missing from the bill this time around....

A possible nomination?

You might have to zoom in a little

Boat Race CBRC style! (men)

2007-04-27T12:52:00.000Z

Forget the Oxford v Cambridge boat race, or the upcoming Bristol varsity grudge match, this is some proper racing (with just a little bit of cheating) between the Men's and Women's squads....

With Julia looking forward to her go at the end of the men's race!