Recruitment Drive

Well, I've done my bit...

Just another day on the docks

Technique Demonstration

It is a little while since a previous member of the women's squad, who was renowned for her intimacy, joined a well known low-cost airline and disappeared from the water.

But, all is not lost.

My cousin, Reet Lush, tells me that a certain redhead was demonstrating amorous liasons in the middle of the dancefloor at Bewdley regatta last weekend.

The Family Lush approves of such fine work - just don't forget to share the love...

Hopping mad!

Imagine....

You're just coming back from an outing, the boat aligns itself with the pontoon, you get out, and they're gone. Where are your trainers? But you're sure you left them stuck in the wall?

And then the truth unfolds.

Not content with stealing bits of bike from outside the boathouse, our lovely friends "the kids" decided to throw all the trainers into the docks.

Now, ordinarily I would be extremely annoyed about this, but seeing Crusher hopping around in his one remaining trainer was bloody funny!

Thanks

As you know, The Lush is ever present, and I was very impressed with the support for the taster evenings earlier this week.

We had an impressive turn out across the board, plenty of help, and hopefully will have attracted many more to join us when the course starts proper in September/October.

As per usual we had a strong bias towards the females, which prompted the anonymous waterside comment "Steve and Stu should have plenty to play with over the next year!!"

No doubt Stu will show us all his skills during the first social!

However, there is still a task to be undertaken...

We are still short of blokes to join up. This is apparently a national trend, so please have a think about whether you could persuade any of your mates/work colleagues to come and have a go.

From the same anonymous waterside source: "So yes we need to make an appeal for more fit, young men please... otherwise Martina and Rona will have no playthings!"

Girls, Boys - get to work and drag in the new blokes...

What you've all been waiting for.

As previous winner of the Clifton Disco Championships 1996, I was pleased to be included on the mailing list for the most important event to play out in Whiteladies Rd for some time.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you the re-opening of Kickers!

Show me you dance moves!

Want to get closer to the action?

Here's your chance to volunteer to help with running the rowing events at Dorney for London 2012.

The real website is here:
pleaseletmekisscracknell.com

Thank God for that!

Mrs Lush tells me that Crusher and Charlie won their Senior 3 event at Bewdley at the weekend.

Now obviously I am very pleased for them...

...and even more pleased that the boat wont get anymore damage this summer!

In celebration "Doug Melvin" has gone off for a little holiday to Dorney to get over his ailments!

It's who you know...

For those of you in the know, the ARA has asked all clubs to label their boats with a registration number (to be phased in over the next few years). As a result, we have been issued with our own pre-fix - "CBR".

It has not yet been decided which boats will be designated with which numbers, but my informants tell me we already have one in the boathouse.

Apparently the owner of a new, privately owned(!) scull has been labelled with the elite and prestigious registration - CBR001.

I wonder who that belongs to?!?!

Super sculler!

You've seen him... the one in the headband.

No-one knows if he has been accidentally transported back from a 1970's US basketball team, or if he is in fancydress...

However, he can scull.

"Headband Man" showed us all the way as he won finals on both Saturday and Sunday at Bewdley.

From Novice to Senior 3 in one weekend? Surely only the work of a superhero?

Sponsored by LadyShave

Ladies,

Ever sat on the startline, taken a sideway glance at the oppo, and thought "Bloody Hell, look at the size of her"...?

Well, have a look at this:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/4681285.stm


Blimey!

BIRC05 - "Heaven on an Erg"

For those of you who feel like you want to go to Birmingham to beast yourselves, entries are now open for the British Indoor Rowing Championship 2005.

It is due to take place on 20th November.

You can enter here:

http://www.concept2.co.uk/birc/

L2R 2005 - Taster Evenings

Hopefully you will all know that we are running two "taster evenings" next week, in an attempt to sort the wheat from the chaff ahead of L2R 2005.

We are expecting up to 80 people over Tuesday (26th) and Wednesday (27th) evenings, and need some help to run it.

Please contact Caroline if you can make it.

Please be aware that normal rowing with be suspended on these nights.

France Part Deux: Start line preparations...

As the UK's finest elite athletes prepare for their first race, it is clear that opposition ought to be very scared!

Link

France Part Deux: Do you do extras?

Crusher looked on with disappointment as the "extras" Charlie asked for were not exactly what he had in mind...


Link

France Part Deux: Should have gone to SpecSavers...

It would appear the vin rouge were affecting Dr Jones rather more than we thought.


Link

Harbour Festival 2005

It is time for the annual bun-fight that is the Bristol Harbour Festival. The organisers are very excited, and say...

"This year will see the largest flotilla of ships yet. There will be navy ships, lifeboats and approximately 250 boats of all shapes and sizes."

Those of you who are not off to Bewdley, please watch out for all those numpties who haven't got a clue what a speed limit is, or how difficult it is to steer our boats!

Fat Matt's Top Tips

If Confucius had been around during rowing outings he would have said, "10 gentle strokes are faster than 9 hard ones and 1 crab!"

Inspired...

Nice racing kit!

In an effort to fully research all areas of "racing advantage", one of CBRC's coaches has found a new-style, aerodynamic all-in-one.

http://cbrcrowing.myphotoalbum.com/view_photo.php?set_albumName=album03&id=P7170088

We look forward to seeing the novice women looking lovely in green!

Do you know this man?

This man was recently caught by a long-lens spy photographer, in the Reading area:

http://cbrcrowing.myphotoalbum.com/view_photo.php?set_albumName=album03&id=P6110062

I think it's time for a caption competition...

View from the outside world

You might be used to prancing about in it, but normal people find it more than a little disturbing...!

http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/A137666

Bewdley Regatta: 23rd-24th July

If you would like Rob to enter your on-form crew, then get the details over to him by 5pm Thursday.

Fill your boots with the best pots on the tour!

World Championship Bog Triathlon

Unlikely though it may sound - we have a Bog Triathlete amongst us.

Marcus (part-time coach to Rona's crew) competed in the inaugral World Bog Triathlon at the weekend which involved a 10m run, 18m cycle and a 120 metre swim in 2 of Wales's finest bogs.

He has now been crowned World Bog Triathlon Silver medalist.

Smelly...

And the cupboard was bare...

As the reports were coming in thick and fast on Sunday afternoon, I thought Bristol were in for another annual pot haul in Cardiff. All the crews had made their respective finals, the sun was out, and we were looking good.

But it looks like Saturday night's dancefloor antics proved to have taken their toll.

Congrats to all who got their finals - better luck at Bewdley(?). They've got better pots anyway...

Do you want to come back to mine?

Whilst Mrs Lush and I were trying to get some shut-eye on Saturday night at LLandaff we were kept awake by some mysterious noises.

On investigation, the highly repetitive creeking noises appeared to be coming from a Port-A-Loo?

Either the pump flush was being seriously over-worked - or there was some less than classy loving going on!

I'm confident it didn't include a CBRC member - the rating was far too high...

France: Crusher for Mayor

After the ferrero rocher and several glasses of vin rouge at the ambassadorial reception, it was suggested that the Mayor of Bristol might like to make a speech. In true English fashion he failed to speak French, and merely shouted in English to ensure complete understanding.

Would CBRC be guilty of such philistine behaviour? Oh no - step forward Crusher, who launched into his Thank You speech with a command of the French language that would have emabarassed Jaques Chirac, and the passion of Gwyneth Paltrow at the Oscars.

"Crusher for Mayor, Crusher for Mayor"!

France: L' Ambassador D' amour

My French cousin, Bertrand (or Bert), has been telling me about a bit of potential "amour" following the recent visit.

I have been asked to keep the names confidential to protect the parties involved, so let's just call them Neil and Marina?

With more than just a guiding hand to show him the way around France, I hear that Neil will be repaying the compliment when Marina visits Bristol later this month.

As they say en france "Vas-y, mon pote"
(trans: Go on my son!)

France: My kind of Veggie

On their recent trip to Bordeaux, the "Twinning Crew" were not shy in trying out a few of France's famous culinary delights.

In fact Dr Jones was so excited he threw away all his vegetarian principles and got stuck straight into the pate. No one had told him it was made from Foie Gras.

Hmmm, I can almost taste the Goose now!

HRR: Lost anything?

Back at Lush Manor, one of the the male members of the CBRC Henley Viewing Contingent had asked the butler to unpack his bag for him, prior to laundering.

Imagine the butler's surprise as he pulled a single black brassiere from the luggage. Vehement denials were issued immediately, so I have taken it upon myself to find the owner.

A Cinderella-style sizing process will begin straightaway, unless anyone would like to step forward?

HRR: Pink Passion

The Lush's Love Radar started to twitch late on Friday night, as those who had taken up position in the Bud Bar started to feel the effects of an all-dayer.

The radar picked up some amorous goings-on between one of our Novice Ladies and a random member of the rowing community, who claimed to be rowing for the infamous Pink Club.

Well, I was so pleased with the news that Bristol was aligning itself with a new level of high performance rower that I started to scour the results to see which Leander crew had been knocked out on Friday, and therefore might be enjoying a beer or two.

I'm still looking...

HRR: Big black puddles

After a frenzied attack on the British establishment that is Pimms, it would appear that the coxless 4's three man got a little lost in his accommodation on Wednesday night.

If only the puddles he leaves in the water were as big as the one next to his bed on Thursday morning!

HRR: Bristol hit the headlines!

Following an eventful start to Henley Royal Regatta last week, Mrs Lush was quick to point out that our boys had made the National Press...

The Times - 30 June
"CITY OF BRISTOL’S Henley experience lasted less than a minute in the Wyfold Challenge Cup coxless fours against Henley at the Royal Regatta yesterday when their steering caused disqualification after 22 strokes."

The Independent - 30 June
"BRISTOL TAKES EARLY BATH."

Heat Magazine - 30 June
"EXCLUSIVE: Perma-Tan Sam (The bow man) has had an all over spray on tan, and the stroke man appears to be wearing something in his hair.

NEXT WEEK: International Loving hits Temple Island with John Wastnage"

Coachie exercise programme

With the ever increasing cost of launch fuel, Gurt has spotted an environmentally-friendly alternative that allows coachie some exercise too:

http://www.gizmag.co.uk/picture.php?s=32&p=2505_06.jpg